"Anxiety and Panic attacks for over 2.5 years"

I have struggled with anxiety and panic attacks for over 10 years.

I have had CBT previously to help me discover and cope with the triggers that caused them. When Covid arrived, it was a whole different ball game.  My panic attacks were constant-there was literally no break between them, shaking, cold sweats, pins and needles raising from your feet upwards through your body, the light headedness and the palpitations. I always liken it to when you're in the sea and a big wave hits and knocks you off your feet. You struggled to get up-you can’t and can’t breathe and feel like you're going to drown and then another wave hits you again and you can’t see a way out! All that on top of your thoughts that were running through your mind and the sleepless nights. Even now, 2.5 years or so after the beginning of the pandemic, I am still in lock down, locked in my house and garden too scared to go out only heading out for doctor or hospital appointments or to get my medication.

Thankfully I live back with my parents, but I haven’t seen most of my family and most of my friends since March 2020. Like most of us we have lost loved ones through the pandemic, I’ve missed funerals of friends and family, weddings and christenings and even haven’t met some of my friends' kids! Lots of other things happened during this time I was discovered to be suffering from health anxiety so basically any time I felt something different in my body, no matter how small, my instant reaction was I that I have covid. I also developed an irritable cough caused by anxiety. 

When I came to CBT this time, I was allocated a therapist, who was slow, methodical, treated me with dignity and respect and put plans in place to help me develop a strategy to take forward to help improve my quality of life.

For me it has been a very slow and difficult process, but my therapist was very compassionate with my feelings and what I am going through.

No matter what you are going through reach out, I know the NHS and mental health services are stretched, but Ealing IAPT are there to help. If you're willing to put in the work in to help yourself and work with your therapist, you can make small steps.