"Panic disorder"

I have never suffered with anything like this in my life I’ve always been confident out going. I have had a lot of stress in my life but thought all of that was behind me. Then Covid hit, money worries and the worry of Covid I found very difficult as I know a lot of people did.

Once Covid had calmed down and we could go out again I found that for me that wasn’t that easy. I became very scared lots of negative thoughts going around my head and scared for my children my friends and family.

When I did go out or sometimes just at home I would feel a very strange feeling coming from my feet it would travel up my legs then a pins and needles type feeling would go all over my chest sometimes onto my face and in my mouth. I felt like I couldn’t breath. I’d have palpitations and get hot, it felt like I was going to pass out. The feeling was very scary, almost like I was going to have a heart attack. This would then cause my IBS to play up. I just felt like it was all too much to cope with. I felt upset and like I was letting my children down I had to do something.

My GP recommended inclusion to me. I had never heard about it before  and was very anxious but at this point I was willing to try anything. I didn’t recognise myself anymore and I needed help.

You first have an assessment they make you feel at ease and comfortable you do have to answer loads of questions but they do this to make sure they can get you the best type of care. It was recommended that I have a 6 week webinar on panic, it was a group thing. I agreed to it and there started my journey to recovery. It was about an hour long per session, feels so long ago now but it really did help to make me feel like I wasn’t alone and wasn’t going crazy. It really helped to make me understand what was happening to me. The ladies that took the webinar were brilliant very kind and made you feel at ease. There were little activities to do but nothing too overwhelming, you could get involved as much as wanted. On the webinar they couldn’t see or hear you, that put me at ease but you could write down anything you wanted to ask.

After the sessions you then had a check in to see what you got from the sessions and how you felt. I felt like I needed more 1-1 therapy as I needed to understand more what was happening to me personally and how to overcome panic linked with IBS flare ups. That’s when I met Megan.

Megan is just incredible, she made me feel so at ease right from the off. She explained everything so well to me and done everything at my own pace. I never felt rushed or like any questions were stupid. Everything she said made sense, we had a laugh and I cried sometimes but it was all ok. As time went on we started to put things in place to move forward and get me to where I wanted to be. It’s been 7 weeks I think and wow what a difference with my hard work and Megan to guide me in the right direction. This week alone I have been out 4 times and that’s a massive thing for me.

I have learnt to live with this panic, it’s part of me it’s not going to go but that’s ok because it’s now becoming my friend in a way - my mate panic! We've even named my panic attacks Vera so they don’t seem that scary and when it does kick off I say not today Vera lol!

When you're in the thick of panic you can’t see a way out you think - that’s it, my life is over, but I promise you it’s not. With people like Megan and the webinar friends and families support you will get there. Talking and learning are your biggest tools to overcome this panic.

Good luck to you reading this and hopefully it helps for you too, to get help and start living your life

Thank you to everyone at inclusion for your amazing help and a special thank you to Megan. Without you I wouldn't have been able to crack this and start living again. I still have a way to go but I’ve got this. Here’s to life and living x