"My husband in ITU"

My husband was admitted to ITU Crosshouse after a fall from height resulting in blunt force chest trauma. Today (3 days later) has been the only proper time getting to see him or get updates as during the day after admission, he was attended to by medics trying to get lines in etc and because physio had seen him. He had declined and needed extra nursing and doctor care. Today he was more settled, so I let my daughter and son in law go up to see him. Having been newly admitted, I hadn't been given any information about the unit, other than visiting times and 2 people at a time as well as a number to call to get access to the unit when I arrive.

This evening's visiting, my daughter and son in law went in and after 20 minutes left, and I then went in. We spoke a few minutes outside about my husband’s health and then myself and my daughter went back in. Because the doors all lock and need to be opened by a nurse, I rang to ask if it would be possible to get into the unit. We were beside my husband talking for about 5 minutes when a member of staff came through to the ward (not my husband's nurse and not the nurse who let me into the ward). In front of 4 patients, who were awake and listening and their visitors, this staff member proceeded to berate us for having more than 2 visitors. We were all looking at each other wondering what they were going on about as there were only 2 of us there. They spoke in a loud and very rude manner, saying they had better things to do than be opening doors for me to come in to see my husband. They then proceeded to tell us it is 2 visitors in total for visiting. I was trying to explain to them I hadn’t been told, however this was useless. Their voice was raised and aggressive and they went into a tirade about them only borrowing the unit … the door didn’t belong to them they had to keep it locked.

This went on with everyone just stopping talking to their relatives and looking over at them. I tried to tell them that I hadn’t been told anything about the ward because this is really the only proper visiting time I’ve had with him since he was admitted. Their response was again loud and aggressive, saying if I had a complaint about my husband being there for 3 days, I should have opened my mouth and said something. We were all just looking at them at this stage, shaking our heads: this wasn’t my husbands nurse and they weren't working in his part of the ward. They hadn’t opened the door to me when I rang to ask to get in (which is the procedure they told me to do). I was trying to explain to them that I'd hardly got speaking to any nurse or doctor about my husband. Again this felt useless. 

He went to ITU when he was admitted and I was told to come up at a certain time. I got there and sat till over 30 minutes past the time asked, then someone told me he was taken to theatre to get lines in for a block and he would be back soon. I later got to see him for a few mins as I knew visiting was long over and staff had stuff to do. The next day I saw him for 1.5 hours.

During visiting hours, I got in to see him and because there was stuff happening on the ward and they were trying to get an arterial line into him, I had a quick half hour with him then left, as surgical team and doctors arrived to access him again. I went up again that night and got to see him for half an hour, as there was a delay again getting into the ward due to the staff being busy with someone. So quick visits and quick updates from the lovely nurses that have been caring for him. We were not updated on any ward visiting information that the not so lovely and unprofessional member of staff provided us with tonight. Not getting in to the ward at the proper time or having to leave early has not been an issue -  I accept it is ITU and the sickest of patients,  and have never complained about that - it is just mentioned here to give perspective to the overall situation we as a family have been in. This staff member certainly wasn’t letting us explain why we maybe hadn’t been given information. They gave another unhelpful comment, saying they would get me a leaflet about the ward and maybe that would inform me better. I advised them not to as they had just spent the last 5 minutes informing us (and everyone around us). I have honestly never come across a more unprofessional member of staff.  My husband was in a bed ill and this is what he had to listen to. He said, when they walked away,  thank god they haven't been near him giving care and he hopes they're not assigned to care for him in the coming days. He also thought they were totally unprofessional and had no respect for the people around them; It felt like my husband’s dignity and empathy were out the window.

The nursing and doctor care he received was wonderful,  it could not be faulted. This individual is doing a total disservice to the Crosshouse ITU unit and their colleagues in the nursing team as it what we have spoken about when people ask for updates. I had to get the name of the staff member in question in this complaint from another nurse. No introduction from them.. who they were etc. There is a professional way to speak to people and especially when you are in a uniform and representing your ward and profession.