"The impact of poor communication"

I have been waiting 12 weeks for an urgent appointment at the Breast Clinic.  I have seen from other posts on here that this is not uncommon, I believe the average wait for an urgent appointment is currently 18 weeks.  

What I wanted to share on here, and what I don't think has been properly considered or addressed in any of the responses so far, is how the wait (and lack of any communication) makes us feel.  I know my anxiety levels are through the roof.

I found a lump in my breast. I immediately contacted my GP surgery who thought it important enough to give me a same day appointment. The GP was very reassuring, talked about how if it is something nasty we had found it early and that treatment for breast cancer is very successful these days.  The GP put in an urgent referral which I know was received the next day.  I cannot fault the GP at all.

A couple of week's later I called the clinic to check that my referral had been received, as I had no letter confirming I was on the waiting list, and enquired about the waiting time.  I was told at that point it was sitting around 9 weeks for urgent referrals.  That kind of shocked me and I told myself that they were giving me the worst case scenario.

The next month I had a mammogram done.  I was told then that the next step was a breast clinic appointment.  I have heard nothing since.  I called my GP who told me they don't receive the results if the clinic requested the scan.  I called the clinic, at this point it was 7 weeks after my referral, and I was told I would have to wait at least 16 weeks (so another 9) and that no-one would give me the results before then.  

I have looked into getting a private consultation but when they listed the costs of the initial appointment in the thousands, I just couldn't consider it.  If I don't hear something soon though, I will go down that route and worry about the debt later.  I am getting desperate.

I only know that my referral is received and I am on the waiting list because I proactively phoned to ask.  There has been no communication from the breast service at all.  It's been over 6 weeks since my mammogram and no one has been able to give me the results. 

Every day I wait for the mail coming in, desperately hoping for a letter. Meanwhile the lump is still there, and becoming more prominent. My poor husband has listened to me crying that I don't want to leave yet, talking about wills etc because when you don't know what you are dealing with it is hard to not think the worst. We are told to check ourselves regularly and that early diagnosis is the life saver - how are we meant to feel when early diagnosis is not an option?

I am so stressed about this all the time, with a feeling of uselessness as there is literally nothing I can do but wait.  I was hoping to book a holiday, but I worry that if I go away, even for a day or two that I will miss a chance at a last minute cancellation.  

People are not complaining about the waiting time because they are impatient or don't understand that the NHS is under a lot of pressure.  We do get that every NHS service is stretched and resources are finite, but we are literally scared.  Some communication, transparency over waiting times and understanding would probably go a long way to helping how we feel (and reduce the number of complaints you have to deal with).