"My experience when having a crisis"

I have severe paranoid schizophrenia with insomnia and depression episodes and am prescribed a number of medications including an antipsychotic injection, sleeping pills, anxiety medication and antidepressants. This is what happened to me when I was feeling really bad over a few weeks recently. 

On one episode, I had been suffering from severe pain in one side of my brain that was affected in strength based upon what I was thinking about. I could feel my thoughts as physical pain in my brain on the left side only and couldn’t sleep or do day-to-day activities. I was in constant severe pain day and night for over 9 days. I was feeling emotionally low and withdrew from my family and friends due to this. I was also hearing constant background sound broadcasts into my mind. I was highly stressed due to this, had a very fragile mental state and lost my appetite. I lost 5 kg in body weight in 1 week. 

I have a young child to look after, and this really affected the level of love, protection and care I could provide to them. 

I made three calls to the crisis team telephone line and left three messages on the voicemail on different occasions but never got a call back. 

Eventually I went to my GP and they assessed me carefully, also consulting with second GP at the practice for nearly 1 hour. They both decided that this was due to a mental illness and not physically related and made an emergency call to Highbury Hospital City Central LMHT. Both doctors agreed that I needed to be assessed by a specialist that very same day. 

The GP made the relevant calls there and then, and then provided me with feedback from the duty team. They told me that they advised they would call me by the next morning latest and refer my case to a doctor and the relevant crisis team for assessment. They said they would also review my medication urgently. 

I never heard from them, it’s been 9 days after the GP made the call. Not one attempt to contact me or my family or update me about what they will be doing to help me. 

I am assigned a dedicated CPN that is my point of contact, they used to see me every two weeks to supply medication and check up on me. They went off sick nearly a year ago and haven’t been back since. The city central LMHT didn’t assign me with another temporary CPN even though it’s in my agreed care plan. They forgot about me and I got lost in the system. 

I was recently moved to monthly depot injections for antipsychotics as I am non compliant with medication when I get ill. Every month on the due date of my injection they fail to come and administer it. I have to call in and remind them every month and then they can take up to a week to arrange it. They just forget about my care. Last month I received my injection 9 days late. 

The consultant is excellent who is based at the QMC psychiatric outpatients clinic and always very supportive. The only thing I don’t agree with the consultant is that they force me to take all medication under threat of section. I have no choice but to take the medication voluntarily otherwise I will be forced in detention. They say I get ill very severely and very quickly when off medication. 

I know that mental health services are stretched but there should be a certain service level agreement between clients and providers, especially considering my situation. I feel like my relationship with healthcare providers have broken down and I am now less likely to engage with services and report to them about my mental state. 

I hope someone from Highbury Hospital City Central LMHT and city crisis team reads this. 

I feel let down by the services.