"My son suffered a serious mental health crisis"

My son began showing signs that he was suffering with mental health issues before covid-19 hit. Throughout and after, his symptoms got so much worse. He stopped showering which for someone who has always taken care of his appearance was a worry. He then became paranoid that all his family were conspiring against him, he became aggressive, he was hearing and seeing things that weren't there. He struggled to sleep and would come round to ours in the middle of the night, and sometimes would mix his words up. He looked terrified. I felt scared.  I tried my best to help him, but I'm not an expert. I looked online and saw that his symptoms sounded like psychosis, which had been made worse by him taking drugs to self-medicate his own symptoms.

He was involved with the community mental health team at this time, but they said there was nothing they could do because my son wasn't attending appointments. He became good at hiding his appointments, he was scared and paranoid, therefore I felt frustrated. How was I supposed to 'make' him attend appointments when he became so good at avoidance strategies. I contacted the crisis team who came to see him, and then put him back onto the community mental health teams list. His symptoms became worse.  He was so scared he became aggressive and threatening. He assaulted a family member.

Everything came to a head, and then he seemed to breakdown and was motionless, almost catatonic. He was scared to be on his own, so he came to live with us. He was up all night too scared to sleep.  He thought any cars driving by was someone coming to get him. He stopped eating food made by anyone else because he was convinced there was poison in it.

Again I contacted the crisis team and a gentleman told me that the wheels would  need to come off the bus before he would be seen, for example being on the police radar. I felt so alone, frustrated, upset and terrified that I was going to lose my son to this very real illness. No one helped.

I understand that they say he needs to help himself, especially as he was  an adult by this time, but when someone is so unwell that they don't have the capacity to make those decisions.  As a mother I felt desperate.

My son began asking me for reassurance that he was ok. He would follow me around to be near someone, saying that he was smelly, and that he shouldn't be here. I took him up to A&E as he was a risk to himself. We spoke to a really compassionate doctor who asked my son questions and my son seemed to trust him and admitted that he was having suicidal thoughts. He contacted the Crisis Team, and again they sent him back to my care saying that he has a loving family, and that someone would come and see him in 7-10 days. I had to take time off my NHS job to care for him because he couldn't be left on his own. It was exhausting mentally, emotionally and physically.

With only Google to give me advice, I just didn't know what to do. Before the 7-10 days were up, I took my son to the GP because he was trying to leave the house with his jacket and bag, but physically couldn't step outside the front door. I had a job getting him to the GP. I was also worried people weren't believing me. I started to feel like people thought I was just a paranoid, overbearing mum. We saw a locum GP who again was compassionate, and reassured me that he believed my son was very unwell and was worried for him. He again contacted the crisis team who replied saying that he was on their list.

I became unwell with covid and so my son went to stay at his Grandparents. They were on the phone to me daily shouting that something needed to be done. I felt hopeless, I'd tried to get him help but to no avail. Along with covid and all the pressures, I was signed off with stress. I felt so down I just couldn't speak to anyone without crying. My other kids lost their mother for a while. My husband and I separated due to the stress of it all.

I phoned the crisis team and explained that the wheels had come off the bus and more, I asked them where the line was, where do we go? Someone came out to see my son that night, and with the locum GP's concerns, the lovely ladies from the crisis team agreed that my son was indeed very unwell. He was sectioned that night under the Mental Health Act. He spent 4-5 months in hospital and was diagnosed with schizophrenia. I felt a huge relief that he was finally getting support.

It wasn't easy, he tried to escape numerous times, and was still experiencing a lot of symptoms. Once the doctors found the right medication for him, his spark came back. His recovery has been slow and steady, and we both agree that neither of us could have gotten through this without some of the Midpark Staff and their reassurances, but in particularly The Early Intervention Psychosis Team in D&G. They were there at every stage.

I educated myself on what psychosis is. I blamed myself, thought I had done something wrong as a mother. The team helped me put everything into perspective and educated me on the risk factors. My son had someone checking on him daily, and then weekly, whether he liked it or not. He started engaging in activities with the help of Jamie, mental health worker. My son and I were supported to put together a plan of action should he start to become unwell again which will prevent things from getting to the stage they did previously.