" If I could have carried my mum on my back to get her home, I would have."

About: Southern General Hospital

(as a relative),

My mum was in poor health for a number of years, but like most mums' didnt complain or tell us what was really going on for her. 9 weeks ago, she informed me that she was going in for a routine procedure, that she was needing some help to get rid of fluid which had built up in her legs and the old, trusted frusemide wasnt working anymore.

My mother walked into that hospital and never came out again. In her time within the wards, my mother deteriorated to such an extent that I couldnt believe my eyes.

It started with the process of catheterising her, to her mobility failing, to pressure sores forming (even though we, as a family were cleansing her skin and doing our best), advising the nursing staff of my mums condition that my mother had to wait three days in agony for "special" pressure sore equipment, even though she was diabetic.

Then, to top that, my mother developed a condition in which her legs literally leaked fluid and incontinent pads were placed on her feet. I erupted after seeing my mother like this, wearing a hospital gown, even though she had her own comfortable nightwear. A reply came back from staff which I found cheeky saying "she asked to wear that"!

My mother was confused, inmobile and cold, always asking for hugs and cuddles, telling us she was frightened.

My heart and soul is gutted, my mother was in her early 60's, didnt deserve to die like that and only got into bed the day before she died. She spent all that time, 24/7, sliding up and down on a plastic cushioned chair. Incidently, we are still waiting for the "special" chair she was to get. Due to this, she developed terrible pressure sores on her backside, to which they prescribed cream "Thovaline" which was useless.

Having worked in social work and care for twenty years, my shouting was not heard and I found communication between staff and with us extremely poor. Because of strict visiting hours, we got to see my mum for an hour and a half every day. This time was spent cleaning, feeding and moving my mother into a more comfortable position, so that we could start the next day, begining the cycle again.

My mother worked hard all her life, was a great mother and provider and I feel she was let down by poor care.

If I could have carried her on my back to get her home, I would have. That option came way to late for my mum and in the end we did bring her home, but not in the way we all wanted. We are devastated.

Do you have a similar story to tell? Tell your story & make a difference ››