"Maternity nightmare 2"

Continued. The midwife kept insisting I was not in labour but at no time did they examine me. Eventually my body started to push involuntary & they noticed. They then asked to examine me & on doing so the baby's hand was clearly visible between my legs. They made a joke about shaking my baby's hand & after a few minutes decided the situation was not quite right & hit the emergency button. Fortunately the Dr was able to push the baby's have back inside so that I could birth naturally. The Dr was also brilliant. Afterwards I was just so thankful it was over & apart from the expected breastfeeding bullying I had good enough after care. Those with a medical background with whom I shared my story said that my baby must've been transverse & I should ensure I made a fuss about this if ever I was pregnant again. I'm now pregnant with my second child. I registered again with Kingston believing I had been unlucky last time round. I told my mw I did not wish to see the consultant but they convinced me to go by telling me I could see only the consultant & promised me I would never have to see another inadequate registrar. I spoke to at least 3 people who promised me the same thing & told me to reiterate this to admin staff when I arrived for my sppointment. I was anxious & staff reassured me. When I arrived at the appointment I was informed that the consultant 'is not in today'. I left. I visited my GP who is brilliant. They said I'd been unlucky & not to lose faith. They wrote to Kingston & the consultant rang me. They spent a long time reassuring me & had a very pleasant manner. They said they would see me at around 24 weeks. I received no paperwork or date confirming ah appointment but fortunately I had the good sense to ask at my 20 week scan. They gave me the time & date of the appointment verbally. I attended that appointment yesterday having run out of school with the chn (I am a teacher) collected my chd who commutes with me & put the peddle to the metal to get to QM hosp for 4pm. I then sat in the waiting room for an hour & 40 minutes. I was forced to leave in the end as my 2 yo became fractious & hungry after such a long time in an unfamiliar place. I was also growing in anxiety. All of this has led to me wanting to change my care provider but having lost complete faith in the system I am too emotionally fragile & all I can find are horror stories about other places which add to my anxieties. I genuinely wish I were not pregnant for a second time despite at one time wanting a large family. I am absolutely frightened to death about what lies ahead for my unborn child & me & have no idea what to do in order to remedy any of this. I wish I had never put my faith in this hospital.