"Lack of support"

I did CBT a while ago and it left me feeling distressed and suicidal about things that happened when I was little. They know about this and it feels like they abandoned me without support, that there wasn’t anything there after.

I went back to the assessment team recently after making a complaint but feel that nothing is different, they still will not support me with the distress and suicidal feelings. They think I should just move on with out it being resolved which is easy for them. I overheard the person I was seeing refer to me as a serial complainer even though I was told they would not know.

I do not feel able to contact the assessment team when I have suicidal feelings because of all this. I feel that I only get a hostile and dismissive response. I am worried that if I try and get help from somewhere else it will be the same there and that will push me over the edge.

I do not feel able ask PALS to support me with going to the assessment team because I felt that they were also dismissive last time.

I do not know what to do and feel it is not worth going on like this.