"Medicated management of miscarriage"

About: Southern General Hospital / Gynaecology

(as the patient),

After 3 years of trying to conceive I finally fell pregnant after IVF. Sadly, at 8weeks 5 days we were told our baby had died. This was confirmed at the EPU at the Southern general Hospital in Glasgow. I opted for medical management.

I still feel this was the right choice, however, the treatment I and my partner received during this time was inappropriate.

When I went to the ward for the first pill, the nurse was very unfriendly and treated me like a naughty three year old.

Yesterday my partner and I went to hospital for the final stage of the treatment. All nurses hardly said a word to us. When we arrived we were put into a room. Ten minutes later another nurse poked her head in and asked if I had brought a urine sample. I said I did not, was not told to. The nurse scowled and without a further word left the room.

I was then given the pills to insert myself. I appreciated the privacy we had after this but other women may find the fact that no-one came in to check everything was alright and progressing as expected a bit unnerving.

When I called the nurse to check the pregnancy tissue as asked yet another unfamiliar nurse came in without greeting, saying absolutely nothing and just took away the tissue. I found this very distressing as I had thought that they would examine it in the bathroom there and not take it away.

My partner went out and asked the nurse in charge to come and speak to us. I asked her what is happening with the tissue and said that no-one on the ward may understand this, but that tissue was our potential child. The first hope of a baby that we had after three years and that we had not consented to it being taken and disposed of by the hospital. The form saying this was in our patient file! Yes, the nurse said to me that she did not know this!

Few hours later she did bring us the tissue and I did appreciate that. But needless to say, we were glad when we could finally leave the hospital in the later afternoon. I was appalled about the in-compassionate and at times rude treatment and hope I never have to go through something like this again.

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Responses

Response from Lorna Gray, Patient Experience, Public Involvement Project Manager, NHS Greater Glasgow and Clyde

Dear Etive,

I am really saddened to read about your experience. Going through such a procedure while you are trying to come to terms with the loss of your much wanted baby will always be an upsetting and distressing time, however I am sad to hear that you were not treated with the compassion and support that we would expect of any of our staff. While this would not take away any of the pain that you and your partner are feeling, a kind word can often provide some level of comfort and make a difficult time a little easier to cope with.

I have passed on your comments to the Head of this service as it is important that what you have said is reflected on and taken into consideration by all levels of staff and I will come back to you to let you know how this is being used for improvement in the department. I know that it was probably very difficult for you to tell your story, and I thank you for doing so.

You may already be aware, but there is a wonderful organisation, The Miscarriage Association, who specialise in providing support and information for couples who have gone through a miscarriage. Here is a link to their website in the hope that this might help you, or anyone else who may be reading this that is going through the same thing: http://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/

I wish you and your partner all the best for the future, and thank you again for getting in touch.

Kind Regards,

Lorna

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