"My Journey as a Carer"

I'm a bit of a radical. I am not conventional. This is my story of caring for my wife. When she was made redundant, it hit her hard. She was very diligent in her work. I became self employed after I retired and my wife started working with me! After 3 years she became more forgetful. Things deteriorated. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and allocated a nurse. The Shiela Gibson unit were very fast and we got sessions to help us.

After lots of care and respite I decided my wife would never be on her own as they didn't look after her the way I could. I have now looked after her for 7 years. We are now near end of life and my wife is looked after by me and the NHS has been very good at giving us what we need to enable my wife to be at home.

The only reason I can cope is by maintaining a positive attitude at all times. I look at everything in a positive way and turn the negatives into positives. Turn it round. Don't leave problems to yourself for too long. Offload this to professionals. When I get a challenge and overcome it I see this as a solution and I feel better. I go to consultation groups at Nottingham University and share my experience.

My wife goes on holiday 12 weeks a year and I take her away every month. I'm a fit fella and I found a problem wheeling my wife around after about two hours! I solved the problem and motorised her wheelchair!

Don't look for problems. Look for solutions. My wife has been doubly incontinent for 3 years and can't feed herself or walk. I have no complaints with the NHS I'm getting more than I've ever had and have the end of life medical pack.

I turn everything round to my own advantage..I come to meetings for me as I don't have my wife to talk to as she can't converse.

I look after myself so I can look after my wife. I get some time for myself when I can this is important. I even have CTTV so I can keep an eye on my wife while she sleeps.