I have called the crisis team on four or five occasions during the last year. Mostly my experience has been on three of those occasions one of hurried indifference the advice even when I have overdosed has been to watch TV. I no longer feel the service is an option that will support me in finding safety for myself.
Compulsive acts of self destructiveness and the feelings of worthlessness and shame that arise with PTSD and dissociative states can be countered by empathy and kindness. As someone who has supported others during these kinds of crises I am shocked that the frontline service for mental health users should be so patchy.
I have commented on this to be told only to contact them when I haven't overdosed but if I haven't overdosed I am not taken seriously. I am wanting to be supported in not self destructing yet it feels like a catch 22 and that I am never supposed to contact them.
I have a strong desire to give my feedback constructively, as input into training for example. I have been told by my care coordinator that nothing can be done about the ways that crisis teams are run. I know that services are massively overstretched but there is a feeling now of blaming the mental health user for requiring the service. This is patently wrong and adds an additional burden of shaming and distress at a time when what is needed is empathy to support to re-empower the service user for find safety or the provision of a place of safety.
I now feel I must deal with these feelings alone or act them without involving any agencies. This is hard because I have both an aspect of myself which is strongly committed to being responsible and survival and I can lose to the compulsions that come from being in a flashback and overwhelmed by the feeling that death is the only way to end the pain and what others want of me.
"mental health crisis"
About: NHS South Devon and Torbay CCG NHS South Devon and Torbay CCG Torquay TQ2 7FF
Posted by gianetti (as ),
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Update posted by gianetti (a service user) 10 years ago